The steam room is well designed. It’s long with wraparound banquettes and a glass door. A guy in there holds up a blue plastic mineral water bottle and says “Is it okay if I…?”
He unscrews the cap of the bottle then pushes the bottle onto a protrusion in the wall.
“What’s that?” I ask.
“The thermostat. It makes it think it’s cold.”
“Has it got water in?”
“Yeah. I was in here this morning and there was no steam so I got this bottle. It has to be one of the square ones or else they fall off. Evian always falls off.”
“You’ve been working on it,” I say.
“It’s my life’s quest,” he laughs.
“I’ve seen people pouring water on them but never sticking a bottle on,” I say.
“Which one do you use?”
“Usually the north London one. The thermostat is a different shape.”
“Some people spray water on it from their mouths, from the drinking fountain. I’ve done that,” I boast.
Two more guys come in.
The water bottle guy says “Apparently there’s this thing, you shouldn’t go straight from the gym to the steam room. You should go to the sauna.”
“Who says?” says one of the new guys.
“I read it in ‘Men’s Health’.”
“So why is that?”
“I don’t know.”
The other new guy says “They just make it up.”
The water bottle guy says “Right. You shouldn’t believe all this stuff.”